Monday, October 10, 2011
Yom Kippur is behind us. Fasting was hard for me this year and I feel a little uncertain about the directions of my turning closer to bringing oneness to my life and the world. It was wonderful though being in service with the Jewish contingent of my family - especially seeing Chris carry the troah in procession and Liam follow behind dancing. I am coming clearer and clearer that I will never be able to be all that I want to be to everyone I love, and that this will becopme even less possible as my capacity decreasing with age. I feel it decreasing - still plenty left but I am not as strong, not as enduring, even with efforts to remain so. There seems to be a lesson of acceptance in my autumn, of resting in being enough as I am. It is a hard lesson.