I'm still thinking about mortality and change - how fast and without warning life can shift or end. I really do think I've been more afraid of suddenness than of ending. Those who know me well know that I have trouble with transitions, even simple ones like getting out of the house and into the car, so it's not really surpriseing that being overtaken by change scares me more than loss does. Loss I know I can accept. Somehow I do feel more peace about the possibility of sudden death since lois died on Saturday. The change in me really doesn't make sense, just a new level of acceptance.

Out of the Blue

On a cloudless day
twin towers crumbled,
biopsy screamed malignant,
heart stopped, earth opened.
We cannot count on warnings.